Junjou EGOIST Part 4~!

I’m on holidays right now so it only took me 2 days to write this one up 😀 
Hiroki really shows his vulnerable side but I think it’s nice for a change.. Don’t more.. he becomes feistier next scene.. if you know what i mean *wink*
Also right now I’m open to recieving ideas for my upcoming Kisa x Yukina Fanfic if you have any suggestions?
~Aki

Part 4.

…Continuing from Hiroki’s last line in Part 3…

Hiroki: “Does that mean.. good–bye.. forever..?”

Without another second of hesitation, Hiroki sprang up from the floor and flew after Nowaki. His thoughts were a mess and he didn’t even know what to call out yet. Upon reaching the door, he twisted the handle, pulling it in and leaping into the dark winter’s night. Hiroki’s hair swayed in the wind as the chilly breeze brushed gently past. Before him was nothing but an empty pathway with metal stairs leading down to the empty car park. Hiroki had a clear view of the area, but Nowaki was nowhere to be seen. It would have been impossible for him to have exited the apartment block in such a short amount of time, even if he had been running. On the verge of freezing, Hiroki dragged his blue feet back inside, locking the door behind him. Ignoring the two half-eaten meals, he drifted to his bed and pulled the blankets over himself. The humming of the dryer filled the silence in the room. Mentally and physically exhausted, Hiroki dozed off to sleep within mere moments of his head reaching his pillow.

–Mitsuhashi University-

Hiroki bared his wide open mouth, squeezing his eyes closed as he yawned, pacing down the school halls from one class to another. For the past 4 nights running, he had been sleeping terribly, waking up with his bed sheets in a mess and dark bags under his eyes. Hunched over, carrying his books in his arms held tightly to his chest, he dragged his feet down the corridor. The faint sound of a familiar voice suddenly seized his attention, and his head perked up in interest. Halfway down the hall, Hiroki saw a slender man with silver hair turning the corner. He was laughing aloud with a wide gleeful grin on his face. Hiroki’s eyes widened and, for the first time in a while, a slight smile appeared at the corners of his mouth.  His hunched position straightened, and his arms weakened. Taking a brisk step forward, Hiroki opened his mouth about to call Akihiko’s name, stopping himself when he noticed another man turning the corner, following close behind the silver haired one. From behind, Hiroki could see his short black hair and his laughter mingling with that of Akihiko. There was only one man Hiroki knew who Akihiko was this close to. It was Takahashi Takahiro. Hiroki knew full well about Akihiko’s one-sided love for Takahiro. As a young man, he had often thought about how similar Akihiko and his situations were. The sight before him brought a flood of emotions onto Hiroki. He was so familiar with the scene, and he saw in Akihiko the feelings that he himself felt.

 

Then it finally sank in.

Was it seeing the two walk side by side together as the distance between the widened?…or the husky chuckles echoing down the hall? Perhaps it was the loving smile Akihiko turned to Takahiro or the way he looked at him? Any or all of these could have been the reason but at that moment, upon seeing the two together, the realisation that he and Akihiko would never be together hit Hiroki hard.

Exiting his last class into the hall, From behind, Miyagi saw Hiroki standing motionless in the middle of the hall. Concerned, he approached, swinging his arm around Hiroki’s neck and hanging over his shoulder.

Miyagi: “Hey Hiroki! What’s up!? If you don’t hurry you’ll be late for class! C’mon”

Hiroki: “…”

Miyagi: “Kamijou?”

Hiroki brushed the hand off his shoulder and swivelled around as Miyagi looked at him in surprise.

Miyagi: “Uhh.. Where are you going? Class is this way!”

Miyagi pointed in the opposite direction, but Hiroki continued to walk sluggishly away as he stood there looking over his shoulder at the troubled man.

Hiroki: “… I’m going home”

Miyagi: “Oh! Not feeling well, huh?”

Hiroki: “Mhmm”

As Hiroki continued to walk towards the building’s exit, he heard Miyagi call from behind.

Miyagi: “HEY! HIROKI! WHAT DO I TELL SENSEI?! HHIIRROOKKII!!??”

Ignoring the yelling, he exited the school and wandered down the street, still clutching his books to his chest tightly, and still with the same overwhelmed expression on his face.

-The Corner Florist Shop-

The door bells chimed as Hiroki pushed against the glass door, entering the florist shop on the corner of the street. Looking from side to side, he slowly proceeded to the counter where he was greeted by the owner.

Otoko: “Good evening! How may I help you?”

Hiroki: “Uhhh.. I was wondering if  Kusama Nowaki was around?”

Otoko: “Unfortunately no sorry, his work doesn’t start for another 2 hours.”

Hiroki glanced down at his wrist watch, forgetting Nowaki was a student and the fact that he had skipped out of school rather early.

Otoko: “Would you like me to give him a message?”

Hiroki: “Ahh yes please!”

Hiroki had no intention of talking with Nowaki upon searching for him at his work. On his journey to the shop, he had written out a note which he planned to give to Nowaki, leaving right after. His heart had been racing with every step he drew nearer to the shop. Nowaki’s absence may have been for the best; Hiroki really didn’t want to cause a scene or create a disturbance.

 

The note read:

– Please meet with me at my place whenever you get off from work tonight.
Kamijou Hiroki –

Pulling the slightly crumpled up, folded piece of paper from his pocket, Hiroki entrusted the man with his message, hoping Nowaki would receive it later.

Hiroki: “Thank you very much! Have a pleasant evening!”

Otoko: “Yes, you too!”

The bells chimed again as Hiroki exited the store into the icy winter afternoon outside. With free time on his hands, Hiroki turned to the one thing which would keep his mind distracted, his books. Books had the ability to transport him to another world and he easily became lost in them. They were his escape from reality.

Reaching his apartment, Hiroki dove straight into his overflowing bookcase, pulling out the first book that caught his eye. Hurrying to get wrapped up in the story, he neglected to read the back or even the title. Hiroki flipped through the first few intro pages and found himself lost in the novel within the first few sentences. Through the whole of the afternoon and late into evening, Hiroki continued to read, but his plan had failed. He found his mind constantly wandering, and he couldn’t stop thinking about Nowaki. Was it a mistake to just give him a note? Should I have just waited until his shift started? What if the man forgot to give him the note? What if he lost it! Will Nowaki even show up? “Goodbye” The words continued to echo in his thoughts, distracting him at every turn of a page. Before he knew it he had spent the whole evening thinking about Nowaki. But a sudden knock at the door drew Hiroki back to reality instantaneously. For a brief moment he sat, motionless on his bed like a deer in headlights. A deep voice called from outside, and Hiroki’s mind immediately overflowed with negative thoughts.

Nowaki: “…Hiro-san?… I got your message…”

Hiroki remained frozen for a few more seconds before finally blinking and stretching his leg out from its crossed position. He trembled as he slowly swung his legs over the bed and straightened up. Walking towards the door the voice called again, somewhat more quietly this time.

Nowaki: “Hiro-san?”

He opened his mouth, but all that came out was a breath of hot air. What was he expecting to find when he twisted the door handle? Nowaki of course, but… what would his facial expression be like? Will this be the last time I see Nowaki? As he pulled the door in towards himself, Nowaki stood there, across from Hiroki. The moonlight glowed behind him and mimicked his figure on the path, the breeze caught his dark hair, and was blowing his scent in Hiroki’s direction, and Nowaki’s sweet, musky odour sent a wave of heat down Hiroki’s entire body. He had never seen Nowaki look quite so beautiful. As Nowaki opened his mouth, words of silk flowed from his lips, and his warm breath turned to gossamer mist, disappearing as quickly as it had appeared.

Nowaki: “Hiro-san… Why did you call me here?”

Again Hiroki’s mouth opened but no sound came out, although his heated breath also condensed and turned to a fine cloud of mist.

Nowaki: “If you have nothing to say then I’ll be —”

Nowaki sighed, a large puff of humidity wafting from his lips as he slowly turned around, about to leave, when Hiroki’s voice was finally released, interrupting him before he could go.

Hiroki: “— I SAW… I saw Akihiko today…”

Nowaki:  *pause*  “Understood…”

Nowaki, leaping to conclusions about where the conversation was heading, again attempted to leave. But all of a sudden, he was pulled back quickly when Hiroki reached out, clutching his coat from behind.

Hiroki: “DON’T GO!”

Nowaki: “THEN WHY SHOULD I STAY!? — ”

Hiroki: “—BECAUSE! I… want to give… ‘us’ a try…”

Hiroki felt a wave of relief having finally said what he wanted to.

Nowaki: “Why?”

Hiroki froze at the question, his eyes widening and lips quivering as his heart raced, pounding deep within his chest. Hiroki’s grasp on Nowaki’s coat loosened, and his hands dropped by his side.

Hiroki: “Huh?”

Nowaki: “Why?”

Hiroki: “Uhh.. I .Well.. I”

Stuttering, Hiroki looked up as he attempted to answer the question. He hadn’t noticed that Nowaki had turned back around to face him and they now stood only inches apart. The heat radiating from his body and his comforting scent were becoming more prominent and heavier than ever; Hiroki couldn’t help but fall forward into Nowaki’s chest, again clinging to his coat. Unexpectedly, Nowaki’s arms wrapped around Hiroki’s back.

Nowaki: “Why all of a sudden?”

Hiroki: “After seeing Akihiko yesterday — ”

Nowaki’s hug slightly tightened around Hiroki, pulling him closer in.

Hiroki: “— I realised that it was time for me to give up on him.”

Nowaki: “Then, why me?”

Hiroki felt like he was being pummelled to a pulp by questions. Each one was becoming more and more difficult to answer, and with the distance between them closed, he was certain Nowaki could feel the pounding of his heart.

Hiroki: ‘Why me?’ Why Nowaki? It’s not just one thing; it’s a combination of all the minute details that make you who you are. It’s your glowing smile, your warm, comforting voice and the way you always smell good. It’s your friendly, unselfish personality, always putting others before yourself and how you are so persistent! But… of all these, nothing can compare to the one thing which separates you from everyone else…

“You’re the first person, to ever say ‘I love you’ like a lover to me”

Nowaki: “And what about your own feelings?”

Hiroki: “I don’t know yet…When you said ‘goodbye’ to me… I knew I didn’t want it to be goodbye forever! I can’t say its love… but I know… I don’t want to be without you…”

Nowaki’s hands left their hold around Hiroki’s back and cupped his face. Hiroki’s cheeks, bright red radiated a heavy heat through Nowaki’s gloves, heating his icy fingers. Hiroki looked up, his eyes red and glistening. His soft lips continued to quiver and as Nowaki leaned in and his heart raced faster and faster. The kiss was warm and soft, Nowaki’s lips lapping over Hiroki’s as his tongue slid in and went rolling over the contours of Hiroki’s mouth. Hiroki’s grasp weakened, as if Nowaki was drawing all the strength from his body. His eyelids unconsciously descended, and his knees became weak, on the verge of buckling underneath him. Nowaki pulled his lips from Hiroki’s and again wrapped his arms around Hiroki, tightly pulling the unsteady man even closer into himself.

Nowaki: “I’m sorry for being so difficult and selfish. But I just had to hear it for myself”

Hiroki nuzzled his head deeper into Nowaki’s chest. He didn’t care anymore about the questions which had been eating away at his heart only seconds before. Of all the places in the world, there was nowhere he’d rather have been than there, within the embracing arms of Nowaki.

To Be Continued…

Written by: Aki
Edited by: Ari

<— Back for part 3: https://yaoifangirlblog.wordpress.com/2013/06/30/junjou-egoist-part-3-n_n/
––> Forward for part 5 (lemon) https://yaoifangirlblog.wordpress.com/2013/07/15/junjou-egoist-final-part-5-lemon/

 

Junjou Romantica MxA Part 1: https://yaoifangirlblog.wordpress.com/2013/02/03/junjou-romantica-misaki-x-usagi-part-1-of-6/
Sekaiichi Hatsukoi RxM Part 1:https://yaoifangirlblog.wordpress.com/2013/02/20/sekaiichi-hatsukoi-ritsu-x-masamune-part-1/
Junjou Terrorist SxM Part 1:https://yaoifangirlblog.wordpress.com/2013/04/14/new-chapter-junjou-terrorist-part-1/
Junjou Egoist HxN Part1: https://yaoifangirlblog.wordpress.com/2013/06/09/junjou-egoist-nowaki-x-hiroki-new-chapter-part-1/